Just like I'd do so on any other morning, I opened my email inbox, and began to feel the familiar mix of trepidation and excitement well up somewhere in the depths of my stomach. I quickly scanned the list of unread emails, ignoring the spam, pausing for a split second at the one reminding me to renew my library subscription...and there it was, the one I'd been waiting for. I opened it quickly. I was hopeful, but my hope quickly gave way to disappointment as I read the text, in Gmail's clean, unimaginative, no-frills formatting.
 "Dear Anuradha,
 Thank you for your interest in my work. I'm sorry but we do not have any positions available currently..."

***

The last few months have turned into a gigantic exercise in sending emails for me. I stalk the people I'd like to work with, online. I spend hours poring over my CV, wondering whether to change this and that, or if the formatting I've used looks good enough. I keep typing out email after email and wait forever for a response, and when I do get a response it's usually disappointing. And then I sit down and swap stories with the bestfriend (who has been amazing, as always, in dealing with my meltdowns and existential crises. Woman, I owe you all the coffee in CCD.) Sigh. Internships seem to be way too competitive.